


As You Wish, Milady

by schmulte



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Mild Language, mentions of torture, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-12
Packaged: 2020-01-05 01:25:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 17,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18355751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schmulte/pseuds/schmulte
Summary: Hiccstrid Princess Bride au. Hiccup Haddock and Astrid Hofferson are in love- but when Hiccup is supposedly killed by the dread pirate Night Fury and Astrid is ordered to wed Prince Snotlout, will their love survive? A story of thrilling sword fights, hidden identities, battles of wits, daring rescues, and of course, true love.





	1. Prologue: As You Wish

The small Island of Berk was cold and stubborn, the people even more so. It rained nine months of the year and snowed the other three. It was made up of small farms and an even smaller village, all surrounding the magnificent castle that belonged to the noble house of Jorgensen. On this small island, on a small farm, resided the Hofferson family, one of the wealthier farming families on Berk. The only child of the Hofferson's, Astrid, was not only beautiful, but also stubborn, strong-willed, brave, and determined. She could hit the center of a target with one throw of the axe from 300 feet away, and was known to be one of the fiercest ladies in all of Berk. And while she enjoyed throwing her axe and riding her horse, Stormfly, her favorite pass time was tormenting her family's stable boy, Hiccup. And though she knew his name, when Astrid had a request, she would only refer to him by saying: 

"Farm boy," she would order. "Sharpen my axe." 

And no matter how demeaning the task, or how demanding lady Astrid was being, Hiccup would always give the same reply. 

"As you wish, Milady." 

For weeks and months this pattern continued. Astrid would return from her daily ride to find Hiccup chopping wood or tending the animals, and she would jump down from her horse and say, 

"Farm boy, tend my horse." 

And Hiccup would merely smile that crooked, freckled smile, the small scar on his chin just catching the light, and would reply with a simple "as you wish." It was not until one day, while Hiccup, who was mending one of the pig pens, covered in dirt and wiping sweat from his brow, gave Astrid that beautiful crooked smile and stopped his work to tend her horse, that she realized that when Hiccup said "as you wish," he was really saying, "I love you." And it was not until a week later, when Astrid was in her room polishing her axe, that she realized he loved him back. 

"Farm boy," she called as she saw Hiccup just outside of her window, covered in mud from plowing the fields. He flashed his charming grin that suddenly made Astrid's heart flutter and ducked inside, wiping his dirt covered hands on the front of his tattered trousers. 

"Fetch me that pitcher of water?" she asked, rather than demanded, pointing to a pitcher that hung well within reaching distance from the ceiling. "Please?" 

Hiccup reached up for the pitcher easily and handed it to Astrid with only his trademark saying. 

"As you wish, Milady." 

Tentatively, Astrid set the pitcher down on her table with the discarded axe and slid her arms around Hiccup's neck, pressing a light kiss to his lips. Hiccup was still for a moment, before carefully placing his hands on Astrid's waist and responding to the kiss. When they parted for air, he rested his forehead against Astrid's, his breathing heavy as his smile spread from ear to ear. Astrid placed a delicate hand on his cheek and sighed. 

"Farm boy," she whispered. "Kiss me again." 

"As you wish, Milady." 

(...)

Hiccup and Astrid's romance grew as the months went on, stealing kisses behind the stables and sneaking away for secret picnics, away from the prying eyes of Astrid's family. Hiccup, who came from a poor upbringing and made little as the Hofferson's farm hand, did not have money for marriage, and so he decided to try finding his wealth at sea. As he stood in the field, his little belongings packed into a patched rucksack, he savored the feel of Astrid's hand against his cheek, kissing the top of her head as tears spilled from her eyes. 

"What if I never see you again?" Astrid choked out through her tears. Hiccup caressed her cheek with his thumb, tenderly kissing a tear that spilled past the corner of her eye. 

"I will always come back for you, Milady. True love will always find its way." 

Astrid buried her face in Hiccup's shoulder, his shirt soon becoming damp with her tears as he held her and pressed soft kisses to her head. 

"Come back to me, Hiccup." She muffled into his shirt. Hiccup lifted her chin with his fingers and placed a lingering kiss to her lips. 

"As you wish, Milady." 

(...)

As the years passed, communication from Hiccup slowly declined, and eventually ceased. His ship had been taken by the dread pirate Night Fury, who had a reputation for never leaving anyone alive once the ship had been seized. When the news reached Astrid, she hid herself in her room and stayed there, locked away from the world. She neither slept nor ate for days, ignoring the axe that lay untended and dull on her table. It reminded her too much of Hiccup, her farm boy, who had diligently sharpened and polished the weapon for so many months. Her farm boy, who she had treated horribly for so long and realized she loved too late, wishing she could have had more time to kiss him, to feel his calloused hands against her cheek. Her farm boy, who she would never see again, despite his promises of true love finding its way. She stared out the rain streaked window to avoid the objects in her room bringing up more memories of the man she had loved and lost. And she made a decision. 

"I will never love again."


	2. Princess Astrid

Five years had passed, and Astrid had grown more beautiful and more fearsome with each day. Prince Snotlout of Berk was now of marrying age and, prompted by the decline of his father, King Spitelout's health, gathered the people of Berk in front of the palace to announce his new bride.  


"My people," he announced from the balcony, his voice booming over the whispers of the crowd. "Today is the day that I introduce you to my bride, your future queen. She was once a commoner like all of you. But I think you'll find, she is not common anymore."  


The prince gestured to the entryway into the courtyard where the crowd was gathered, a red carpet cutting through the center of the crowd. The trumpet fanfare began to play as a figure emerged from the entryway to step into the carpet, as prince Snotlout announced the arrival of his fiancee.  


"Princess Astrid!"  


Astrid took a deep breath and stepped forward on the carpet, watching the people surrounding her kneel. The dress Snotlout had made her wear was heavy and restricted her movement, the skirt too long for function and the fabric to thick for mobility. Still, despite her discomfort, she held her head high with Hofferson pride, avoiding the eye of her future husband. Though the law of the land declared Snotlout could choose any bride he wished, Astrid did not love him.  
(...)  


The only solace Astrid found were her daily rides on Stormfly, away from the palace and the irritating prince. She rode deep into the forest, miles and miles away from the town, feeling free and light despite her restrictive royal clothing. Stormfly whinnied and came to a stop in front of three travelers, who were standing in the middle of the road, shifting nervously. They were three men, the one in the middle, who appeared to be their leader, had carrot red hair and three claw-like marks across his left eye. To his left stood a buff man covered in silver scars, his chin tattoed with three blue lines and black hair swept back into a ponytail. The third man looked especially nervous, husky with shaggy blonde hair, glancing from side to side and wringing his hands. The man with the red hair cleared his throat and stepped forward, a friendly grin spreading across his face.  


"Excuse me, miss," he spoke. "We are humble merchants weary from travel. Are we near the town?"  


"There's no town nearby, sir." Astrid replied politely. "No one lives within fifty miles of here."  


The red haired man's grin widened as he gestured the blonde man forward.  


"Then there will be no one to hear you scream."  


And without more than a few seconds to react, the blonde man reached Astrid, and her whole world went dark.  
(...)  
Fishlegs and Eret set Astrid into the boat as gently as possibly, binding her hands with a rope as Dagur ripped a piece of cloth he had pulled from his satchel and tacked it to Stormfly's saddle.  


"What's that?" Eret asked, leaning the princess against a barrel on the ship.  


"A piece of cloth from Berserk's military uniforms." Came Dagur's gruff reply. "When the prince finds the cloth on his princess's horse, he'll assume she was kidnapped by Berserk's military. And once he finds her body on the shores of Berserk, his suspicions will be confirmed."  


"You didn't say anything about killing her..." Fishlegs said nervously. Though he was a big man, he was rather adverse to most violence.  


"We were hired to start a war, muttonhead!" Dagur snapped. "Of course we're killing the princess. Do you want to go back to unemployment?"  


"No...I just don't think it's right, killing an innocent girl."  


"We were paid to kill a princess and start a war between Berserk and Berk, and that's what we're going to do. If you don't like it, find a new line of employment!"  


With a small "eep," Fishlengs clambered onto the ship, followed by Dagur after he gave the horse a swift pat on the rump, sending it back to Berk. After securing that the princess was properly restrained, the three kidnappers sailed off towards Beserk.  
(...)  


Astrid awoke on the ship, her head throbbing and her wrists rubbed raw from the rope they were tied with. Several hours must have passed, as night had fallen and they were now sailing under the cover of darkness. The man with the chin tattoos, Eret, she heard, was peering behind them as he steered the helm.  


"Dagur, I think someone's following us." He murmured, casting a glance at the carrot-headed male. Astrid looked behind the ship as Dagur sneered, and saw the outline of a ship following them at a steady pace.  


"It's probably just a fisherman out for a late night pleasure cruise." Dagur scoffed. "We'll lose him by morning. "  
(...)  


When morning came, the ship was still behind them, having come closer during the night. Dagur gave a low growl and pointed to the towering cliffs that were looming ahead of them.  


"Whoever's following us, he won't be able to follow us up the cliffs! He'll be sailing around to look for a port for hours. Fishlegs, grab the princess."  


Fishlegs made to grab Astrid as gently as he could, even as she struggled and managed to catch him in the jaw with her elbow, calling him a string of insulting curses as he recovered from the blow and hoisted her over his shoulder.  


"Don't resist princess, it'll only make me want to kill you more." Dagur sneered, attaching Fishlegs to a rope that hung from the top of the cliffs. He harnessed Astrid, himself, and Eret to the husky man as Fishlegs began to climb the rope, careful not to go too fast so he wouldn't drop a passenger. Astrid stopped struggling only so she wouldn't fall, but she continued in her string of insults.  


"Mutton headed, son of a half-troll, rat eating-"  


"The man from the ship!" Eret exclaimed. "He's climbing the rope!"  


Astrid dared to look down at the ground below her, and discovered a man, dressed in all black and wearing a mask that covered the top half of his face with the exception of his eyes, climbing the rope with ease in pursuit of the group of four. Dagur slapped Fishlegs on the shoulder, eliciting a small grumble from the bigger man.  


"Move faster, you oaf! He's gaining on us!"  


"He's not carrying three people..."  


"Go faster or you're fired!"  


Fishlegs sighed and began to ascend up the cliff, the edge in sight. Every time Astrid looked down, she could see the man dressed in black coming closer and closer, seemingly not bothered by the grueling climb. Eret was the first to detach himself from the harness and climb up to the edge of the cliff, helping Dagur up first before gripping Astrid's arm and pulling her up. He set her down on a rock before helping Fishlegs up as Dagur pulled out a knife and began cutting at the rope. Astrid gasped as the rope finally snapped, peering over the edge to see the fate of the man in the mask. Miraculously, he had changed to grip the rocks of the cliff, climbing slower now and slightly unsteady as the rocks cut at his hands. Dagur howled in frustration and hauled Astrid up, pushing her towards Fishlegs.  


"Change of plans. Fishlegs and I will head off with the princess, Eret, you stay behind and follow us after that man is dead. If he falls, fine, if he lives, the sword."  


"Can I use my left hand?" Eret asked, examining his sword. "Otherwise it's not much of a challenge."  
Dagur let out an exasperated sigh and a strained "have it your way" before stomping off, pursued by Fishlegs and Astrid, leaving Eret to face the man now climbing up the rock face.  


"Hello down there!" Eret called. The man looked up, a scowl on his face as he climbed.  


"If you don't mind, I'm trying to concentrate here. So unless you're going to throw down a rope, I'd like to be left in silence."  
Eret shrugged. The man's voice was slightly more nasal than he expected, but he must have been strong due to his perseverance.  


"I could lower you a rope. But just so you know, I'm planning to kill you as soon as you get up here."  


"Well in that case, lower it so you can kill me faster. Might as well get it over with."  


"Fair point."  


Eret lowered the rest of the rope down the cliff face, which the man gratefully clung to and used to pull himself up within a matter of minutes. Panting, he crawled on his hands and knees and sat against a rock, hand on his sword. Eret raised a hand.  


"Rest a while. I want to kill you when you can put up a fight."  


The man in the mask let out a dry, sarcastic chuckle.  


"Gee, thanks."  


Eret leaned against an adjacent rock, peering at the man opposite him.  


"You don't happen to be hiding a burn under that mask, do you?"  
The man in the mask shook his head and lifted the corner of his mask, revealing smooth, freckled skin. Green eyes narrowed at Eret, his hand fidgeting with his sword.  


"Why do you ask?"  


Eret stiffened slightly and sat down next to the man. If he was going to kill him, he had nothing to lose by telling him a bit about his life.  


"My father was killed by a man with burns covering half his face. He was an expert sword maker, and the man with the burns commissioned a sword from him." He lovingly patted the hilt of his own sword. "When the man with the burns came to pick up the sword, he demanded it at a third of the expected price. My father refused. Without a second though, the man with the burns slashed him through the heart. I loved my father. I couldn't let him be murdered without justice. So I challenged his murdered to a duel."  


"How old were you?" Asked the man in the mask. Eret sighed.  


"Eleven. The man let me live. But he gave me these as a reminder." He gestured to the white scars on his arms. "Since then, I studied swordplay, hoping to one day find the man with the burns and challenge him once more. I will go up to him and say, "I am Eret, son of Eret. You killed my father. Prepare to die.""  


The man in the mask nodded and leaned his head back against the rock.  


"I'm sorry about your father. I hope you get your revenge."  


"Thank you. You seem a decent man. I hate to kill you."  


"I hate to die."  


"Well then." Eret clapped his hands together and stood, drawing his sword from the scabbard. "Shall we?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is our mysterious man in the mask? You'll find out next chapter!  
> For those of you who are fans of the original movie, I will be cutting/modifying a couple of minor scenes. Everything important from the plot will be there!


	3. Three Duels

Eret was the first to make his move, stepping forward to make a quick jab aimed at his opponent's heart. The man in the mask was yawned and blocked the sword with ease, landing a quick warning slice to Eret's arm. 

"Is that all you got?" The man in the mask almost laughed. "I would have thought you'd try harder to kill me." 

Eret struck again, again being blocked and earning himself another jab. They continued in the same pattern, moving throughout the space, blocking and jabbing at each other. Both men were sure to never make a blow fatal, not yet. They both enjoyed the fight, and Eret had all the time in the world to catch up to Dagur and Fishlegs. 

"You are an excellent swordsman." Eret wheezed, aiming to strike at the man's leg. "Who are you?" 

The blow was again blocked, the man in the mask dropping low to kick Eret's leg out from under him. 

"No one important." 

Eret was up in no time, again striking towards his black-clad opponent and being relentlessly blocked. 

"I must know." 

"Get used to disappointment." 

Eret managed to drive the other man back, causing him to stumble just slightly. 

"I have a secret to tell you." he grunted. "I am not left handed." 

With that, Eret smirked and shifted his sword over to his right hand, effectively pushing the man back to the edge of the cliff. 

"I have a secret for you too." said the man in the mask, grinning. He moved the sword to his left hand and drove Eret back from the cliff's edge. "I'm not right handed." 

With a smirk, the man in the mask managed a kick to Eret's stomach, driving him to the ground. Triumphantly, the man pressed the tip of his sword to Eret's neck, holding him captive. Eret dropped his sword and raised his hands. 

"Kill me quickly. I'll see my father again in Valhalla." 

"You aren't going to Valhalla today. But I don't want you following me." 

The man in the mask brought the hilt of his sword to Eret's head, plunging the man into darkness. Sheathing his sword, the masked marauder made his way past Eret and towards where he had seen Dagur escape to with the princess. This was going to be a long day. 

(...) 

Dagur looked behind him and groaned, taking Astrid's bound hands from Fishlegs and into his own. 

"That muttonhead Eret let the man in the mask go. Fishlegs, hide behind a boulder. When he turns the corner, throw a rock at his head." 

Fishlegs fidgeted nervously, peering back at the shape approaching them. 

"Oh dear...I don't know if I can do that..." 

"Do it or you're out of a job, you troll! I don't care how, just kill him!" 

Dagur left in a huff, dragging the still-struggling princess Astrid behind him. Fishlegs picked up a rock and peered at the masked man who was slowly approaching. Once he was within throwing distance, Fishlegs launched the rock at the man, purposefully missing and smashing the rock against the adjacent rocky wall. The man flinched and frowned as Fishlegs appeared, wringing his hands. 

"That...that was a warning." 

The man in the mask raised his hands in appeasement, backing away a few steps from the larger man in front of him. 

"C'mon, big guy. You don't wanna hurt me." 

"Well, no...but Dagur says if I don't he'll f-fire me..." 

Sighing, the masked man took his sword out of its sheath and dropped it to the ground. 

"Okay then. Let's fight as the Gods intended. Man to man." 

"A-are you sure...? I'm a lot bigger than you." 

"I'm stronger than I look. Come on, you can have the first hit." 

Raising his fists, the masked man took a wary step towards the bigger man. He knew that he was small and lanky, but he had speed and agility, and he could land a hard blow if he needed to. Fishlegs took a clumsy swing towards the man's head. Dodging the punch, the masked man rolled on the ground and swept Fishlegs' legs out from under him. The husky man stumbled but stayed upright, making to grab at his opponent. With a quick roll and a kick to the back of his opponent's knees, the man in the mask felled Fishlegs and watched him come crashing to the ground. With a swift knock to the head, he saw Fishlegs drift into a dreamless sleep. He leaned down and patted the man's shoulder. 

"Sleep well. Dream of Gronkles." 

With another affectionate pat to the blonde man's head and a quick sheath of his sword back in the scabbard, the masked stranger set off again in pursuit of Astrid. 

(...) 

On the edge of the cliff, prince Snotlout inspected the footprints in the sand and stood, mounting his horse, Hookfang, once more. His second-in-command, Viggo Grimborn, along with several infantrymen of the Berk army, sat on their horses by his side, looking to their prince for guidance. 

"There was a duel here." Snotlout announced. "The winner went west with my princess. Go after him! I'll have his head on my wall." 

(...) 

When the masked stranger made it over the crest of the hill, he rested his hand on the hilt of his sword and glared. Dagur was sitting on a rock with Astrid next to him, her eyes blindfolded and a dagger at her throat. There was large rock set up in front of them serving as a table, two goblets and a pitcher of mead set atop it. Dagur grinned and held a hand out to the stranger. 

"One more step and she dies." 

The man held both his hands up and reached for a small vial in the pouch at his side, holding it up so Dagur could see. 

"I'm sure the princess can take care of herself. But seeing that you have her tied up, I offer you a deal." 

With a glint of intrigue in his eye, Dagur beckoned the stranger forward. The man in the mask sat on a rock across from the makeshift table and handed the vial to Dagur, who inspected it carefully. 

"That vial contains Zippleback gas." the masked man explained. "Unscented, tasteless, and dissolves in liquid." 

"I know what Zippleback gas is." Dagur snapped. The stranger flashed a cocky grin. 

"Then you know how fatal it is." 

The masked man took the vial back and poured mead into both the goblets before turning away from Dagur. After a moment, he rested the glasses back on the table and discarded the empty vial. 

"I've placed the Zippleback gas into one of the goblets. Choose the one without the poison, I die and you get the princess. Choose wrong, and you die. Savvy?" 

Dagur frowned and glanced at the goblets in front of him. He contemplated the thought process of the stranger in front of him- anyone smart would put the poisoned goblet in front of his opponent. But he didn't know anything about this man's intelligence. He must be strong, having defeated both Eret and Fishlegs, he thought. But, being a man of strength, he may believe he was strong enough to withstand the poison. With a small quirk of his lips upwards, Dagur folded his hands. 

"Deal. Hey, what's that behind you?" 

"Where?" The stranger said, glancing behind him. As his opponent glanced backwards, Dagur switched the goblets around. 

"I could have sworn I saw something...must have flown away. Anyway, let's drink." 

Both men raised their glasses to each other and nodded before each taking a sip. After the masked man took his drink, Dagur began to laugh maniacally. The stranger raised an inquisitive eyebrow. 

"What's so funny?" 

"I switched the cups you idiot!" Dagur wheezed, his face puce with exertion from laughing. The masked man merely gave him a small smile as his deranged opponent continued laughing. Suddenly, the laughter stopped. With a small choke of realization, Dagur's eyes rolled back in his head and he fell to the ground, dead. The man in the mask quickly cut away Astrid's wrist bindings and removed the blindfold from her face. Wide, azure eyes stared at him in shock, glancing to the man on the ground. 

"You killed him." she accused. "Your cup was poisoned the whole time!" 

"Both cups were poisoned." the stranger replied, glancing behind him. The sound of horses approaching was slowly becoming louder, signaling prince Snotlout's forces closing in. 

"I've spend the last three years building a tolerance to Zippleback gas. Let's go, highness." 

The masked man hauled Astrid to her feet, ignoring the wave of abuse that poured from her mouth as he hauled her further west, away from Snotlout's army and the poisoned man.


	4. The Dread Pirate Night Fury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the kudos! This chapter will be a little short but we will finally see who our masked man really is!

The masked man roughly set Astrid down against a large rock on a the grassy hill, the impact uncomfortably jolting her back. 

"Rest, highness." He grunted in his slightly nasal, almost familiar voice. Astrid's azure eyes narrowed at the stranger, trying to make out a face behind his mask. 

"Once I get my hands on an axe, I'll chop all your bits off one by one, starting with your-" 

"I'm sure you would, princess. But right now, you're unarmed." 

Astrid sneered at the man opposite her. She hated his stupid cocky grin, the way he casually leaned against a rock with his hand lazily resting on the hilt of his sword. She wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off his face and bury her axe in his throat so he wouldn't be able to taunt her with his stupid nasal voice. She was tired, travelling for days, and angry. So so angry, for being defenseless when she was a Hofferson, trained in weapons and combat. She was angry for playing the role of the simpering delicate princess for so long, but after Hiccup...she didn't have the strength to resist Snotlout's orders. And he was the prince, after all. He had the right to do whatever he wanted. Even if what he wanted made Astrid want to launch a blade into his skull every time he opened his mouth. And now she was kidnapped twice, left to the mercy of the masked man in front of her, who obviously had no intention of letting her go. She glared daggers at the stranger in front of her, trying to decipher why he felt so familiar to her. 

"I know who you are." Astrid declared. The stranger raised an eyebrow, that stupid cocky grin still on his lips. 

"Oh? And who would that be, highness?" 

Chest puffed with pride, Astrid gave the cocky smirk right back to the man in front of her. 

"You're the dread pirate Night Fury." 

Smile never faltering, the pirate gave the princess a sarcastic bow. 

"At your service, Milady." 

"Don't call me that!" Astrid snapped. Anger flashed in azure eyes before she stalked forward towards the pirate, fists balled in determination. With a snarl of rage, the princess struck Night Fury across the face, effectively getting rid of his grin. 

"Don't EVER call me that!" 

Night Fury tenderly rubbed his cheek where Astrid's hand had left a red mark. Forest green eyes turned briefly dark with anger, before his eyes crinkled just slightly with amusement. 

"Did I strike a nerve there, highness?" 

"The man I loved used to call me that. Before you killed him." 

The pirated only offered a shrug. 

"I have a reputation to maintain. Leave a prisoner alive, the other pirates think you're going soft and then it's work, work work..." 

"He was innocent!" Astrid made to slap Night Fury again, but found her wrist stopped by the pirate's firm grip. The callouses on his fingers felt oddly familiar, but she forced herself to push the thought away. 

"And who was this boy? Another prince like Snotface?" 

The pirate released her wrist and gently pushed her away, looking down to hide his face briefly. Astrid rubbed her wrist and glared at the man. If looks could kill, he'd be dead ten times over by now. 

"No," she spat. "A farm boy. Poor. With the heart of a dragon and eyes as green as pine needles." 

Night Fury sarcastically tapped his chin as if deep in thought. He paced about the area for a few moments, smiling a bit at the frustration in Astrid's eyes. 

"I remember this boy. Scrawny, but fierce. He died well. He didn't beg or bargain. He just said "please." "Please, sir. I need to live."" 

Astrid frowned. Of course her Hiccup would be brave in the face of death from a relentless, murderous pirate. He was brave and kind, and was anything but a coward. The pirate continued his story, stopping his pacing to face Astrid. 

"I asked him what was so important that he had to live. "True love," he replied." Night Fury gave a mirthless laugh. "True love. He spoke of a girl, I can only assume you're her. A girl who was as fierce as she was beautiful, and faithful beyond anything." 

"You don't know-" 

"Faithful, he said!" the pirate growled, inching closer to Astrid. There was a mix of anger and hurt in his eyes, lean muscles tensed under his black clothes. 

"Tell me, princess, when you found out he died, did you immediately run to Snottykins or did you wait a whole week out of respect?" 

"Listen to me you rat eating son of a half troll!" Astrid snapped, facing down the pirate. "I died that day! And you can die too for all I care." 

With a flash of rage, Astrid shoved the pirate down the grassy hill, his mask flying off as he tumbled. From her position on the mountain, she could hear the pirate yelling as he tumbled. 

"As you wish, Milady!" 

Eyes wide and a gasp escaping her lips, Astrid listened to the words in shock. 

"Hiccup...?" she murmured. "Oh Gods-" 

Astrid threw herself down the hill after him, groaning as she hit rough patches on the hill. She landed with a thud beside Hiccup, his black clothes now covered in grass and dirt, mask discarded to reveal the pale, freckled face of her love. She threw herself against him, cupping his cheeks with both hands and pressing kisses to his freckled face. Hiccup wrapped his arms around Astrid's waist as she pulled him in for a deep kiss, her face wet with tears. After a long moment, Hiccup reluctantly pulled away and brushed the hair away from Astrid's face, kissing her forehead. 

"I thought you were dead..." she whispered wetly. Hiccup placed a kiss to her nose. 

"Death can't stop true love, Astrid." 

Astrid sat up and punched Hiccup hard in the shoulder, eliciting a yelp from the pirate. 

"Ow! Why is it always violence-" 

"That's for letting me think you were dead for five years," said Astrid, landing another punch to his shoulder. Roughly, she grabbed the front of his shirt and hauled him up for another heated kiss. 

"And that's," she breathed. "For everything else." 

Hiccup rubbed his tender shoulder and sat alongside Astrid, cupping her cheek. His thumb wiped away some of her almost dry tears as he lifted one of her hands and pressed a chaste kiss to the palm. 

"Why didn't you wait for me, Milady?" 

Astrid looked down at the grass, aware of the hurt in Hiccup's green eyes. 

"You were dead...and Snotlout...he's the prince. I couldn't refuse him. But I never stopped loving you, Hiccup. I have spent every day hoping that you would come back to me." 

Hiccup moved the hand on her cheek to rest on her chin, gently tilting her head up to meet his gaze. Her cheeks were wet with fresh tears, azure eyes watery. 

"I will always come for you, Milady." 

Astrid placed a hand on his scruffy cheek and pulled him in for another kiss. It was slow and sweet, and said more than words ever could have. When they parted for air, Hiccup briefly allowed himself to rest his forehead against Astrid's before standing and offering her his hand. She took it and stood, lacing their fingers together. For the first time in five years, she felt the same warmth in her chest as she did whenever she saw Hiccup on the farm. She felt...happy. Hiccup stared lovingly into her eyes and pressed a light kiss to her blonde hair, ignoring the twigs and grass stuck in the blonde locks. He had missed her, had missed the scent of the lavender soap she used in her hair, missed the way she would hold him and trace delicate but strong fingers along his skin. It had been five years of piracy and frankly not always pleasant company, and now he could be at peace. At peace with his Astrid, his lady, the love of his life. 

Their small moment of peace was rudely interrupted by the thunderous sound of hooves. Hiccup peered up to see prince Snotlout riding astride with his infantry, sneering down at the two of them from the top of the hill. Tightening his grip on Astrid's hand, he pulled her along in a brisk run, away from the prince. 

"Snotlout's an expert tracker, he'll find us." Astrid managed to shout over the wind. Hiccup shook his head and continued forward towards the dark marsh that was coming up on the horizon. 

"Not if we go through the Dragon Swamp."


	5. The Dragon Swamp

The two lovers held hands as they entered the dragon swamp, fingers intertwined and palms pressed together as if an invisible force had bound them with rope. Every tail Astrid had heard of the swamp swirled through her mind as she stepped to avoid the roots that dared attempt to trip her in her walk astride Hiccup. Tales of creatures that could burn the flesh off a man's bones from a hundred feet away. Tales of men who entered the swamp and never came back- or worse, those who did and emerged changed. The young princess pushed the thoughts from her mind as Hiccup hacked at loose vines with his sword, disregarding them silly tales meant to scare children and nothing more. She tried to ignore the quiet chittering that could be heard from the trees above. Any flying shadows in peripheral vision was passed over, nothing more than the trick of the light. Stepping over a particularly large root and cutting a vine that swung down in front of her face, Astrid sighed and stole a glance over at Hiccup. He had given her his dagger for defense, knowing she preferred the axe, but the sentiment was appreciated. One of the things Astrid loved about Hiccup was that he knew she was independent, more than capable of taking care of herself, and he wasn't intimidated by it like Snotlout was. He had never tried to dissuade her from her daily weapons training, had never suggested she take up a more ladylike pass time. She knew that he loved her not in spite of her fierceness, but because of it. He had admired her as a humble farm hand, in awe of her skill and determination. 

But now, looking into the face of the man she loved, Astrid didn't see the scrawny farm boy from five years ago. Years of piracy had changed him, turned his scrawny bones into lean, powerful muscle that rippled just slightly as he hacked at the vines. His chin was dark with a layer of scruff, the small silver scar on his chin still barely visible. His face was contorted in concentration and sweat was beading on his brow. 

"Hiccup?" 

He broke from his determined gaze ahead to glance over at Astrid, his gaze softening as he laid eyes on his love. 

"Milady?" 

Astrid slashed at a vine that nearly caught Hiccup in the face and she gave her a small smile in appreciation. 

"I'm confused. The pirate Night Fury has been around for twenty years, but you've only been gone five." 

Hiccup gave a noncommittal shrug and continued on, wiping his blade on his pants and tugging Astrid in a different direction to avoid a group of nasty looking roots. 

"What I said before was true, about saying please. Night Fury captured my ship and asked why I should live, and I told him about all I had to live for." 

He pressed a small kiss to the back of Astrid's hand to silently reassure her that she was that something to live for before continuing with his story. 

"I guess he felt sorry for me, being a scrawny lovesick fishbone. So he took me in and made me his cabin boy. He used to say every night before bed, "Goodnight, Hiccup. I'll probably kill you in the morning." And honestly, I was surprised he didn't. He said that every night to me for years. Eventually, we became friends. And one day-" 

Astrid threw a hand in front of his chest as a dark shape flew past and disappeared in an instant. Hiccup gave her other hand a squeeze and carefully continued on. 

"One day, Night Fury called me into his cabin and he told me a secret. He told me that he wasn't the pirate Night Fury. His real name was Gobber. The Night Fury before him was named Ack. The real Night Fury has been retired for fifteen years on Meathead. He had passed the name on to Ack, then Ack to Gobber, and then Gobber to me. It's not the person who's important, it's the name that draws fear. I mean, no one would be afraid of the pirate Captain Hiccup." He snorted at the thought. "So, Gobber gave me the name, got a new crew and stayed on as first mate, the whole time calling me Night Fury. After he convinced the crew, he retired. And I've been a ruthless pirate ever since." 

Astrid nodded, giving his hand a light squeeze. She gripped her knife tighter in her other hand as a second shape flew by. Hiccup held his sword firm in front of them and urged her forward. The deeper they went into the swamp, the darker it became, the thick canopies of the trees blocking the sunlight. More shapes seemed to appear and Astrid could swear she could hear soft growling. 

"Hiccup," she whispered. "What if we see a dragon?" 

"A dragon? They're extinct, Milady." 

As soon as the words were out of Hiccup's mouth, a swarm of the black shapes rushed at them, knocking the two apart. Astrid shrieked and slashed at the shapes with her dagger, managing to catch a couple of them as they flew by. 

"Hiccup!" 

Astrid could make out the faint shape of Hiccup slowly recovering from the fall and fought her way over to him. Azure eyes widened as one of the creatures set one of the trees on fire. One of the branches caught the flame and it crashing down on to Hiccup's left leg. His scream was almost drowned out by the noises of the creatures and the crackling of the wood, but to Astrid it was louder than a thunderdrum on a silent day. She raced to his side and hacked away at the wood until he was freed and patted at the fire with the skirt of her dress. His leg was badly mangled from just below the knee and she could see he was straining himself in the attempt to not scream again. 

"Shh, shh. It's okay, Hiccup, but we've gotta get out of here." 

The princess ducked underneath the wounded pirate and lifted him to his feet, throwing his arm across her shoulder and almost dragging him out of the swamp. Hiccup groaned in pain, hopping along on his right leg in his attempt to match Astrid's speed. 

"I know, Hiccup. We're almost there, c'mon babe." 

The creatures continued to follow them until they reached the edge of the swamp, blue eyes relieved as she saw the light of day and the open woods in front of them. Hiccup sighed and pressed a kiss to Astrid's head as she grinned madly. 

"We did it! We survived the dragon swamp!" 

Hiccup managed a small, self-deprecating smile. 

"I think you did most of the work, Milady. Hauling all...this around must not have been light work." 

Astrid rolled her eyes and punched him lightly in the shoulder. 

"Ow! Wounded man here!" 

"That's for being a complete mutton head and almost getting yourself killed." 

"Wha- is it always violence with you-?" 

Astrid pulled him close and pressed a rough, urgent kiss to his lips. He happily reciprocated and gave a whine of displeasure when she pulled away. 

"And that’s for everything else." 

Hiccup gave a small shrug, his dopey grin wide and eyes half-lidded after their particularly passionate kiss. Astrid managed to snap him out of it with a jab to his rib cage and continued in pulling him along. As soon as they were fully out in the open, the undeniable sound of horses descended upon them. Astrid stepped protectively in front of the injured Hiccup as Snotlout and his men rode up, a triumphant grin on the young prince's face. 

"Princess! Thank Thor I found you. Viggo, please kill the outlaw and escort my princess back to her horse." 

"No!" Astrid shouted, blocking Hiccup from the scarred man who had come forward on his horse on the prince's command. Snotlout raised a bushy eyebrow as Astrid glared at him. 

"If I go with you, will you swear you won't hurt him?" 

"WHAT?" came the reply of both Snotlout and Hiccup at the same time. Astrid sighed and gripped Hiccup's hand. 

"If I go with you, will you swear to Odin you won't hurt Hiccup?" 

"Hiccup?" Snotlout laughed. "What kind of name is Hiccup?" 

"Promise me!" 

The laughter stopped as Snotlout saw the rage in Astrid's eyes. Wiping a few tears away, he puffed his chest back up and sat straight. 

"Whatever my princess wants, my princess gets. I swear to Odin that if you come quietly, I won't hurt your Hiccup." 

"Astrid, no." Hiccup said, bringing a hand up to cup her cheek. "I only just got you back." 

Astrid sighed and placed her hand over the one on her cheek, leaning into his touch. 

"I thought you were dead once. I can't lose you again. Trust me, when I get my hands on an axe-" 

Her words were cut off as she was roughly grabbed by Snotlout and hauled away on his horse. Hiccup leaned against a tree and smirked at the scarred man in front of him. 

"We both know Snotface isn't gonna keep his promise. Might as well get it over with." He held his hands out to be cuffed and hopped slightly on his good leg. The scarred man flashed a yellow grin and rode forward towards Hiccup, signaling an infantryman to cuff the pirate. 

"I appreciate your honesty. It will make killing you much more entertaining." 

Hiccup scowled and leaned towards the other man. 

"Your scars down the side of your face...I know someone who wants you dead." 

And then Hiccup's world went dark.


	6. The Man With the Plan

Hiccup awoke in chains. They were sturdy, slightly rusted metal that locked around each individual wrist and attached to the low ceiling above him. His legs were chained together at the ankles, the cold medal digging into his painful left leg. The limb was badly mangled and the burned flesh was visible through a rip in his pants. The cell was cold and dark with low ceilings, the only light cast from a dull torch suspended next to the entrance. It was cold and the air smelled damp. Hiccup could only assume he was in some kind of cave that had been modified into a makeshift prison. Stairs that led down to the left of the cell were barely visible through the small window in the door. It was large and made of thick wood, held shut by a thick iron bar across the middle. Observing his surroundings, the pirate tried to formulate an escape plan. Under normal circumstances, he would have been able to come up with something in about five minutes. But here, in a country he hadn't been to in five years, in an unfamiliar place, unarmed, leg throbbing with pain, Hiccup found himself defenseless. Even if he was able to escape his chains, the leg wouldn't let him travel far. The pressure he was forced to put on the broken limb as he stood was enough blur his vision and stir nausea. Taking slow, steady breaths, Hiccup let his head fall, his chin almost touching his chest, as footsteps approached. He heard the metallic clicking of the door being unlocked and keys jangling as the dim light flooded through the now open door. Viggo stood before the prison and made a "tsk" sound, tilting Hiccup's head up with his thumb and forefinger on his scruffy chin. 

"I'm disappointed, Hiccup." the man sighed. "I was hoping you'd have the strength to not succumb to your wounds so quickly. It will make torturing you much less fun." 

"Guess you'll just have to get used to disappointment." Hiccup managed. The sarcastic comment earned him a slap with the flat of Viggo's sword, eliciting a groan from the prisoner. 

"I'd watch my mouth if I were you. Now," Viggo beckoned for a guard to enter with a table laid with items that Hiccup could only assume were instruments of torture. The scarred man flashed a satisfied grin. 

"Shall we begin?" 

(...) 

Ryker Grimborn, captain of the guard of Berk and brother of Viggo, knocked politely on the prince Snotlout's office door before entering and giving a curt bow. 

"You asked for me, sire?" 

"Ryker, come in. I have a task for you." 

The humble servant nodded and sat in a chair across from Snotlout's desk. The young prince lovingly cleaned his dagger with a cloth, feet up on the fine carved desk. 

"My spies have told me that the Berserks are planning to kill my princess on our wedding night." 

"I have heard no such news-" 

"My princess has to stay safe." Snotlout snapped. "I want you to place thirty guards in front of the palace and send the rest to empty the Thieve's Forest." 

"Sire-" 

The two men were interrupted by a knock on the door as Astrid strode in, arms crossed and a frown on her face. 

"Princess!" Snotlout grinned and got up to kiss her hand. The hand was angrily snatched away. 

"Don't touch me." 

Snotlout, unfazed, shrugged and leaned in close. 

"Come to see your handsome prince at work, princess? I knew you'd come around eventually." 

Astrid rolled her eyes and suppressed the urge to smack the grin off his face. 

"Snotlout," she began, trying to remain calm. "I have a deal for you." 

"Oh?" A black eyebrow shot up. "Whatever my princess desires." 

"I will never, ever be your princess. Now use your yak dunk sized brain for once in your life and listen to me. You will send your fastest riders after wherever your guards escorted Hiccup to after you set him free. You send them each with a message telling Hiccup that if he comes back before the wedding and comes for me, I will go with him freely and you won't follow us. If he doesn't come back in time, I will marry you." 

Snotlout let out a mocking chuckle. 

"And what if I don't, princess?" Astrid's fists balled at her sides. 

"Then you'll find yourself in your marriage bed alone with an axe buried in your chest." 

"And if Hiccup doesn't come in time, you'll marry me?" 

"He will come back. And when he does, you can be sure that I will never. Ever. Marry you." 

With a smirking glance over at Ryker, Snotlout gave the princess a nod. 

"Deal. I'll send my four fastest riders at once. But I'd prepare for our wedding night. Just in case your Hiccup doesn't show." 

"Hiccup will always come for me." Astrid spat. And with that, she turned from the room and stomped back to her rooms. Snotlout smiled to himself, knowing Hiccup would be dead far before their wedding day in a week's time. He sat back down behind his desk and made to address Ryker. 

"Like I said. Thirty guards outside the palace, empty the thieves forest." 

"And if the boy does come for the princess, Sire?" 

"If by some miracle that talking fishbone he lives until then, kill him on sight." 

(...) 

Ryker watched on as his guards rounded up the residents of the Thieve's Forest. They had successfully emptied almost the entire forest in little under an hour, the disgruntled men, women, and children screaming through the bars of the wagons. He nodded to a guard that approached him, panting hard and sweating profusely. 

"Are we almost done?" Ryker questioned tonelessly. 

"Almost, sir. There's one who's giving us a bit of trouble." 

"Well, take care of it. The prince ordered everyone out of the forest. We can't leave anyone behind." 

The guarded nodded and sprinted back off in the direction of the troubling resident. Eret was seated in front of his small hut, hand gripping the hilt of his sword as he sneered at the guards that were attempting to remove him from his home. A familiar husky blonde shape approached, holding out his arms in peace. A grin broke out on Eret's face. 

"Fishlegs! What are you doing here, you big brute?" 

"I got a job with the guard squad to remove people from the forest...but I don't really like it that much..." 

Eret clapped a hand on Fishlegs' shoulder as the husky man waved the other guards away. He leaned in close to whisper in Eret's ear. 

"Eret...I found the scarred man. The one who killed your father." 

The tattooed man's grip on his sword tightened, knuckles almost white. His voice dropped to a low whisper. 

"Who?" 

"He's the brother of the captain of the guard. He's the prince's right hand man. His name is Viggo." 

Eret allowed himself a small smile, squeezing Fishleg's shoulder. 

"Well done, Fish! Now all we need is a plan...and I know just the man for the job." 

"Oh dear...Dagur was the one who came up with all our plans before." 

"We don't need him anymore, my friend. Who we need...is the man in the mask."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the plot thickens! Will Eret be able to rescue Hiccup and get his revenge? Will he be rescued before the wedding? So many questions! They'll be answered soon enough!  
> Disclaimer: Snotlout and Hiccup are NOT related in this story.  
> Also: thank you so much for the kudos! Feel free to leave comments and don't forget to subscribe so you'll be notified when the next chapter is up!


	7. The Broken Deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will have a bit of violence in it! Nothing too graphic, but it can be a little hard to read for some people so just be wary!  
> Also Snotlout is going to be a bit OOC, but hey, someone has to be the bad guy.

Several days had passed and Astrid was beginning to grow restless. Snotlout had become more demanding since the deal had been made, insisting Astrid stay inside the castle at all times and having his guards keep a close eye on her at all time. The prince had reassured her that he had sent his best and fasted riders in pursuit of Hiccup, but there had been no word since. Not even an assurance that he was alive. Astrid tried to stay positive, tried not to doubt Hiccup's love for her. But the thoughts were always there, nagging at the back of her mind. Had Hiccup's affection for her diminished during the past five years? Did he not care if she married Snotlout? She knew that these things weren't true and suspected that Snotlout had done something to tamper with their deal. After five days had passed with no news and the wedding fast approaching, Astrid knocked the guard at her bedroom door unconscious and stormed to Snotlout's office. 

"What did you do to him?" 

Snotlout attempted to look confused but Astrid could see he was attempting to bite back a mocking smirk. 

"What are you talking about, princess? I've been nothing but truthful-" 

"That's yak shit and we both know it, Snotlout. I know you didn't let Hiccup go. So where is he?" 

The facade left Snotlout's face, replaced by anger in his dark eyes and a vengeful twist of the lips. 

"Your Hiccup is somewhere where you'll never find him." 

"He will escape. And when he does, when I find him, I'm going to bury a blade so deep-" 

Snotlout gripped her wrist hard enough to bruise. He had a murderous look in his eyes that scared Astrid more than she wanted to admit. 

"You listen to me, princess. Even if by some miracle you were able to make it to Hiccup, you'd be too late. I will make sure of that." 

"You can't stop me. True love-" 

"True love means nothing. It won't help you find him. Hiccup will die, and you'll be mine." 

"I will never be yours. My heart will always be Hiccup's." 

"That may be true, princess." Snotlout flashed a predatory grin. "But I don't care about your heart. Guards, would you escort the princess back to her rooms? I think she's a little over excited." 

The guards came in and dragged Astrid, kicking and screaming, out the door by her elbows. 

"You won't get away with this, you Loki damned, rat eating half troll!" 

"Oh, princess. I already have." 

(...) 

Hiccup hung limply, held upright only by the cuffs around his wrists and nothing more. He had been drifting in and out of consciousness all day, eyes open only for a moment before the blackness would creep back in. The back of his shirt was tattered from the relentless slashes of the whip he had endured. He had stayed strong, visions of Astrid appearing in his mind as he bit his tongue and accepted the tortures with suppressed whimpers. He refused to give Viggo the satisfaction of a scream, which only seemed to make the man angrier, and the tortures more inventive. He was sure his ribs were bruised and his left leg throbbed and ached more than it had before. Blood dripped down from his split lip and broken nose down to the floor. He counted the droplets to keep himself awake. One, two, three. The count started from the beginning again after he would drift into unconsciousness and wake again. One, two, three four. 

When the blood clotted, he thought of Astrid's face and counted again. Eight pale golden freckles splayed across smiling cheeks. Ten delicate yet strong fingers, running through his hair. Two beautiful azure eyes that looked at him in the way that he knew was reserved for only him. Two perfect pink lips that placed kisses along his forehead and down his jaw and spoke words meant for his ears only. Two voices. All thoughts of Astrid slipped from his mind as Hiccup counted two voices. One belonging to a man he feared, the man who had tortured him relentlessly, day after day. And the other...the other belonged to Snotlout. 

"Sire, please, the prisoner needs to rest before I can continue, the torture-" 

"I am your prince! Show me to him-" 

"He'll die-" 

"Perfect!" 

The door to the cell was unceremoniously yanked open and Hiccup instinctively bowed his head and braced his body. The enraged face of Snotlout approached and yanked the prisoner's head up by his hair. 

"Snotface?" Hiccup wheezed. "This must be some cruel new type of torture. Viggo, if you could go back to the whipping, I think we'd all prefer that." 

Growling, Snotlout landed a blow to Hiccup's already broken ribs, earning a low whine of pain from the prisoner. His grip on his hair tightened and stretched his neck further. 

"You think you're funny, huh? Is that why my Astrid loves a talking fishbone like you? You're nothing!" 

"Would rather...be nothing...than named Snotlout."

The prince let out a strangled sound of rage as he pressed the tip of his dagger to the freckled flesh of Hiccup's throat. Viggo was panicking and protesting in the background, but the noise was muffled as Hiccup focused on Snotlout's contorted expression. 

"You think you're funny, huh? You think "true love" is going to save you? Let me make something clear," the tip of the blade pressed further into his neck, drawing a single drop of blood. 

"Astrid is mine. And for some reason, she wants a scrawny little nothing instead of me, a prince! You are the one thing standing in my way, and I will not hesitate to end you." 

Hiccup gave a weak smile, the stretching of the flesh drawing new blood from his split lower lip. 

"That...all you got Snotface? So worried...about Astrid...you have to...threaten a scrawny fishbone? I'd...worry about...yourself...if I were you. Think you need to...hit the gym." 

Screaming, Snotlout released his grip on Hiccup's head and, ducking low, plunged the dagger into Hiccup's injured leg. The sounds of Hiccup's screams mingled with the shouted protests of Viggo. With a taunting grin up at the screaming prisoner, he twisted the knife deeper, drawing out louder screams from the defenseless Hiccup. White-hot pain seared through him as the familiar blackness crept at the corners of Hiccup's eyes. Had he been conscious enough to think, Hiccup would have guessed that his screams could be heard all the way in Valhalla. With a final twist of the knife, Snotlout withdrew, leaving a parting word to Viggo which Hiccup did not hear before he left. Hiccup allowed his head to drop once more, and he could have sworn he heard the faint voice of Astrid calling to him before he succumbed to the blackness once more.


	8. Mostly Dead

Eret and Fishlegs had been searching for two days. The wedding of prince Snotlout and princess Astrid was to take place that night, and Eret was starting to lose hope of ever finding the masked man. The kingdom was on high alert with tight security. Thirty palace guards were stationed at the front gate, and more were stationed throughout the town. The only place free from watchful eyes was the newly emptied Thieve's Forest. Eret had a suspicion that if the masked man had been taken by Snotlout's guards, he would be kept in the forest, away from the town and any chance of accidental discovery. But after what seemed like hours of searching, there was still no sign of him. The only place left to look was the cove, and if he wasn't there, they were lost. Fishlegs sighed as they entered the small, enclosed area, shaking his head. 

"I don't know about this, Eret." the blonde man said. "Statistically speaking, if the masked man has been kept prisoner for this long, there's a 98% chance the prince has already killed him." 

"He's the last chance we have, Fish." Eret replied, clapping a hand on his companion's shoulder. "Where's your sense of adventure?" 

"I don't think I've ever had one of those..." 

Eret sighed and unsheathed his sword. This was his last idea, and if it didn't work, all hope of finding the masked man and gaining revenge was lost. 

"Father," he whispered to the sword. "I need to avenge you. Please- guide my sword to the masked man. Help me exact my revenge." 

He closed his eyes and held the sword out in front of him, taking a few steps and trying to block out Fishlegs' whimpers. Eret stumbled, the tip of his blade hitting the rocky wall of the cove with a metalic ding. But when the swordsman opened his eyes, he saw only a solid wall. He had used his last resort and it had been fruitless. Dismayed, Eret leaned his head against the wall. More metallic noises came, but not from Eret's sword. They were coming from behind the wall, as if a door was being unlocked. Eret jumped back and beckoned Fishlegs closer as the small section of rock where Eret's head had previously landed on pushed into the wall and opened a door in the surface of the rock. Sheathing his sword, the man grinned and pulled his companion along inside. 

The inside of the cave was dark and damp as condensation dripped from stalagmites above the two men's heads. Black stone stairs carved into the surface of the rock descended down into the ground and lead to a small, open chamber with a single, heavily locked wooden door positioned in the side wall. The chamber was eerily quiet and lit only by a single torch that hung on the wall. There was a dark red substance stained on the floor just outside the wooden door. 

"Oh dear..." Fishlegs murmured. Eret pressed a finger to his lips and, gripping the handle of his sword, made to kick down the door. The locks were heavy but rusted, and it only took a few powerful kicks from the heavy boots of the swordsman to break them and swing the door open. Cautiously, he entered the small room with Fishlegs at his side, who was now holding the torch that served as their only source of light. He stepped forward and shined the firelight towards a shape at the center of the room. The two men's eyes widened in shock. 

Suspended from the ceiling by heavy chains was the masked man, unconscious and limp. No longer was he the powerful swordsman who had bested both the men before. Now, he was pale and still, his clothes tattered and bloody, breathing shallow as the cold sweat of fever ran down his brow. Glancing down, Eret could see that the man's left leg had been badly damaged below the knee, the flesh seeming to hang by a threat and coated in dark blood. Fishlegs gingerly placed his head over the man's heart. 

"Is he alive?" Eret asked. Fishlegs shook his head and sighed. 

"Barely," he answered. "We'll need a miracle." 

Eret sighed and scratched his tattooed chin. They couldn't take an outlaw to a healer, not with the amount of guards Snotlout had set up throughout the kingdom. They would need to find someone special, off the grid...and then it hit him. 

"And I know where to get one." 

(...) 

The two men had trecked back through the cove and into the forest, each supporting one arm of the injured man around their shoulders. Finally, just on the border of the forest and the town, Eret spotted the small hut. He urged Fishlegs forward and knocked on the door rapidly. The little sign on the side of the building read "Ruffnut and Tuffnut Thornston, Miracle Workers LLC." Eret whispered a silent prayer to the gods. This had better work. 

The door opened a crack and a squinting face peered out. It was a man with blonde dreadlocks and a rather ridiculous looking hat, peering suspiciously at his visitors. 

"What do you want?" the man spoke. "Are you after my chicken?" 

Eret suppressed the urge to groan. This man was obviously crazy, but he had heard that he and his sister's talents in miracle working was unmatched. 

"We need a miracle for this man," he answered, gesturing with his free hand to the unconscious Hiccup. The incredulous look on the blonde man's face disappeared and he opened the door fully. 

"Oh, why didn't you say so? Tuffnut Thornston of Ruffnut and Tuffnut Miracles, at your service." He gave a grand bow. "Hey sis, we've got customers!" 

The three men entered the small hut and laid Hiccup down on a table that lay in the center of the room. There was an odd collection of items scattered around, and a chicken was wandering around and pecking at various crumbs on the floor. A girl, who must have been Ruffnut and looked almost identical to the man with the dreadlocks, came into the room and grinned at Eret. 

"Why hellooo, beefcake. What miracle can I work for you?" 

Eret choked a little and gave Fishlegs the opportunity to speak as he regained his composure. 

"Our friend here needs a miracle...he's not exactly in the best shape. He's almost dead." 

"Let me take a look." Tuffnut said. With an overdramatic flourish, he pressed his head to Hiccup's chest. He stayed there for a few seconds, nodding and mhm-ing to himself before he stood back up with a triumphant look. 

"He's only mostly dead." he declared "Which means slightly alive." 

"Awesome." Ruffnut chuckled. Eret jumped back as the girl gave him a wolfish smile and traced a scar on his forearm. 

"So uh..." Eret stuttered, desperately trying to hide behind Fishlegs. "What can you do for him?" Tuffnut shrugged and pulled his sister away from the terrified Eret. 

"That legs looks pretty gnarly, it'll probably have to come off. But the rest, we can fix." 

"Yeah, if you've got the cash." Ruffnut interjected. Fishlegs and Eret patted at their empty pockets. The husky man scratched the back of his neck nervously. 

"Uh..any chance you'll do it for free?" 

The twins looked at each other and shrugged. 

"Depends." they said in unison. Tuffnut leaned in close to Hiccup's face and shouted: 

"Hey! What's so important that you have to live for?" 

Hiccup's sweaty brow furrowed and his cracked lips opened just a fraction. 

"As...trid..." he whispered. Tuffnut frowned and stood back up. 

"Astrid? That his pet or something?" 

"I think that's the name of the woman he loves." Fishlegs offered. "She's getting married to the prince tonight..." 

"The prince?!" the twins shouted. 

"We hate that guy!" said Ruffnut. 

"Yeah," Tuffnut followed. "We'd do anything to stop his wedding. Well. Almost anything. I am NOT wearing a dress again..." 

"Can you fix him or not?" Eret questioned, exasperated. The twins shared a look and flashed grins that made Eret even more nervous. 

"C'mon butt-elf," said Tuffnut. "Let's get to work." 

"You got it, bride of Grendyl." 

The two eccentric blondes set to work. Fishlegs and Eret had to leave the room while they removed the parts of the leg that couldn't be saved. Fortunately for the sick man, he was so out of hit he barely even flinched as they removed the lower half of his limb. When the leg was properly wrapped and bandaged, the two men came back in to see Ruffnut and Tuffnut putting the finishing touches on a small pill. 

"This'll bring him back." Ruffnut explained, popping the pill into Hiccup's mouth. The man's face scrunched up a little as he swallowed and then relaxed again. 

"Awesome." Tuffnut breathed. Ruffnut handed Eret a wooden crutch and winked. 

"The pill should start working in about ten minutes. He'll need this to walk though." 

Eret nodded in appreciation and got Hiccup back upright with the assistance of Fishlegs. 

"Thank you." The tattooed man grunted. Ruffnut winked at him. 

"Any time, beefcake. Any time." 

(...) 

The two men had just barely made it to the bridge in front of the palace before Hiccup started to stir. Snapping his eyes open, the injured man glanced at the two men holding him. 

"Wha-" 

Eret clamped a hand over Hiccup's mouth and set him down to sit against the wall of the bride, himself and Fishlegs kneeling before him. 

"We rescued you from your cell. You were almost dead so we had Ruffnut and Tuffnut give you a miracle pill." 

"Mmmr mmph?" Eret started and took his hand from the man's mouth. The man frowned up at him. 

"Where's Astrid?" he demanded. 

"She's getting married to Snotlout half an hour. That's why we need your help." 

Hiccup's eyes darkened in anger and he tried to stand, but found himself unable to and glanced down at his legs. Or rather, his intact right leg and the stump of what used to be his left, ending just below the knee. 

"Oh Gods-my leg-" 

"There was nothing they could do to save it. We have a crutch so you can walk." 

"How am I supposed to fight Snotlout when I can't stand on my own? Oh gods, Astrid's gonna kill me." 

"We'll help you get your revenge." Eret reassured him. "After we get mine." 

"And how exactly are we going to get into the castle? We can't just stroll in! "Oh, hi Snot, great wedding. Hey, remember when you arrested me and had me tortured? Well now I'm going to kidnap your bride and kill you, thanks for the party favors!"" 

Fishlegs and Eret shared a look. The blonde man rubbed his hands together. 

"We were kinda hoping...you would come up with the plan." 

Hiccup sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

"Okay. Here's what we'll do..."


	9. Storming the Castle

The girl standing in Astrid's mirror was a stranger. Fierce blue eyes were now downcast, hopeless. Blonde hair was twisted into intricate braids, the cream white dress uncomfortably tight and heavy. She pitied the girl in reflected back at her. This wasn't Astrid Hofferson, the Valkyrie that had once wielded a powerful axe and loved a poor farm boy with an odd name. This was a completely different person, unfamiliar, defeated. Snotlout had made sure that she had no doubts that Hiccup was dead, and that she had no hope of escape or rescue. Her Hiccup, who had come back into her life after five years, only to be taken away so harshly. Her sweet farm boy, the boy who had sharpened her axe without having to be asked and once walked ten miles and back to bring her wildflowers when she was upset, was gone. And Astrid had no choice but to go through with the wedding. Until she could manage to steal a weapon, she was trapped. She had no hope of finding something before the wedding. Snotlout had made sure of that. But as soon as she could get her hands on some steel, the prince wouldn't live much longer. She'd be killed for her crimes, she was sure, but death was a reasonable price to pay to avenge her Hiccup. She may even be able to see him again in death. The thought brought a sad smile to the girl's face. The thought of seeing Hiccup again could be enough to get her through the wedding without a violent outburst. 

A knock at the door shook Astrid from her thoughts. With a final glance at the mirror, smoothing the skirt of her dress, she beckoned her visitor in. King Spitelout entered and offered his arm. Astrid's parents were not permitted to attend the wedding, so it was up to the king to escort her down the aisle. Taking a shaky breath, she took her soon-to-be father in law's arm and made her way to the great hall, a silent prayer on her lips. Freya, let Hiccup be alive. Odin, give her strength. Gods knew she would need it. 

(...) 

Snotlout took the final moments before he was due to attend the wedding to consult with Viggo. He was steaming, his face puce and jaw clenched tight. 

"You let the prisoner escape?" 

Viggo offered his hands peacefully. 

"I assure you, sire, he will not make it out of the forest alive." 

"He'd better not." Snotlout huffed and shoved his ceremonial sword into the scabbard at his hip. 

"My brother has confirmed the entrance to the palace is impenetrable. Even if the boy escaped alive, he will not make it past the guards." 

"This plan has to work. Once I marry the princess, I'll take her to her rooms and kill her. We'll tell the kingdom a group of Berserker spies had killed her and they'll demand we go to war. Then we can crush them and take their lands, and when my father retires, I'll be the king of both islands." 

"It is an excellent plan, sire. But it won't happen if you miss your wedding." Viggo gestured in the direction of the great hall. "I believe I just heard your cue." 

With a huff, the young prince left the corridor and took his place in front of the priest of Odin in the great hall. A villainous smile crept across his features as a dismayed looking Astrid walked towards him, arm in arm with the king. Spitelout offered her a chaste kiss to the cheek and took his place next to his wife, leaving Astrid to stand beside Snotlout. Her fists clenched at her sides as the priest of Odin began to speak at an agonizingly slow pace. 

"Marriage...is what brings us together...today. To join these two people...in holy matrimony...blessed by the Gods..." 

Astrid closed her eyes and whispered to herself, drowned out by the slow speaking of the priest. 

"Please hurry, Hiccup." 

(...) 

The palace guards, under the not-so-watchful eyes of Ryker, will milling about. None of them really understood the extra precaution, and many were a bit put off to be missing the wedding the feast. They were bored, hot, and hungry. They yawned and absent-mindedly scratched their bellies. Nothing exciting ever happened on guard duty. And besides, the entire kingdom was crowded on the other side of the castle, waiting to see the newlyweds step out onto the balcony at any moment. No one in their right minds would be out and about today. 

Suddenly, the bored guards were alerted as distant screams could be heard from their comrades. Ryker narrowed his eyes and peered as a black shape approached, the soldiers screaming and dodging its way. It seemed to be floating on air...The captain of the guard screamed at his men and withdrew his sword, though he retreated to the safe darkness in front of the gate. 

The dark figure approaching was actually Fishlegs, swathed head to toe in a black cloak and standing on the edge of a wheelbarrow. Hiccup was sat in the back of the object, holding a torch, while Eret pushed. 

"I am the dread pirate Night Fury!" Fishlegs commanded. "And I have come for your souls!" 

Hiccup tried to hold back a snicker as the soldiers screamed and ran into each other in an attempt to get away. He snuck a glance at Eret. 

"Now?" 

The tattoed man nodded. 

"Now." 

With a smirk, Hiccup lit the black cloak on fire. Fishlegs tried to hold the panic back from his voice as he shouted another warning at the soldiers. The screams only grew louder and finally, the men began to scatter, allowing the three men direct access to their target. When the men were completely gone, Fishlegs jumped down from the wheel barrow and shed the burning cloak. He walked forward as Hiccup clambered out of the barrow and leaned on his crutch to follow, supported by Eret. They cornered in on the cowering Ryker. 

"Where's the key?" Hiccup demanded. Ryker tried to look intimidating. 

"There is no key." 

Hiccup nodded grimly. 

"Okay then. Eret, if you'll do the honors-" 

"Oh, you mean this key!" Ryker exclaimed. He produced the key from under his shirt and handed it over to a triumphant Hiccup before promptly fainting. The three men stepped over his body and unlocked the gate, stepping onto the empty castle grounds. 

"Okay," Hiccup began. "We all know the plan. Eret, you find Viggo and get your revenge. Fishlegs will help me get to Astrid's room and then secure the horses for when we leave." 

The two men nodded and Eret's hand went to the hilt of his sword. 

"If I'm not there in half an hour, assume I'm dead." He clapped a hand on Hiccup's shoulder. "Good luck, my friend." 

"You too. Now come on, we don't have a lot of time." 

(...) 

Snotlout was beginning to get agitated. The priest of Odin was speaking at a turtle-like pace and he didn't like the little triumphant smirk it brought to his bride's lips. On top of that, as soon as the priest had finally, finally reached the vows, there was the sound of shouting outside the palace. Every head in the procession turned towards the entrance and Astrid's smile widened. 

"I told you he'd come for me." she murmured to the prince. His face twisted with rage and he gripped her arm tightly. 

"Get to the vows, old man." he commanded the priest. The man took a bit of insult but did as his prince commanded. 

"Do you...prince Snotlout Jorgensen...take this woman...in sickness...and in health...to be..." 

The priest was drowned out by the screams that were growing louder outside. Snotlout's grip on Astrid's arm tightened. 

"Man and wife, say man and wife!" 

The priest of Odin's brow furrowed a bit, but the man nodded. 

"Man...and wife." 

Without hesitation, Snotlout dragged Astrid out of the great hall and up towards her room. 

"You will stay here until I come to get you or I will kill you without hesitation. Understand?" 

Astrid had no time to reply as she was unceremoniously shoved into her room and the door locked behind her. Sighing, she sat at her desk and absentmindedly toyed with her hair. A glint caught the corner of her eye and she reached towards the source of the reflection of light. Her axe rested perfectly balanced in her hands and she lovingly stroked the flat of the blade. Someone must have been on her side to have smuggled it to her. Now all she had to do was wait for Snotlout to come back and bury it in his- 

"Could use a little sharpening, but if you want to chop Snotlout's balls off, it'll do the trick." 

The princess suddenly turned and launched the axe at the voice from behind her. It sunk into the wall just above the headboard of the bed where Hiccup lay, flashing her a crooked grin. With a gasp, Astrid practically threw herself on top of him and pressed sweet kisses along his cheeks, lips, forehead, jaw, nose, anywhere her lips could touch. Hiccup gave a weak chuckle and rested his hands on her hips. 

"I missed you too, Milady." 

"Snotlout told me you were dead." she whispered, pressing a kiss to the scar on his jaw. 

"Who, me? There's no way Snotlout could take down all this raw vikingness." 

Astrid pulled back and carefully surveyed him. His expression was cheerful, but there were dark circles under his eyes and there was a fading bruise across his cheek. He had a hand protectively over his ribs, and as her eyes traveled downward... 

"Your leg-" 

"Occupational hazard, Milady." Hiccup reassured her. "Couldn't be a proper pirate without missing a limb or two- OW! I'm an injured man, you know!" 

Astrid huffed as Hiccup rubbed his newly sore shoulder. 

"That was for nearly getting yourself killed." she snapped, looking away to avoid his green gaze. Hiccup lifted a hand to cup her cheek and turn her head to face him. 

"C'mon, Ast. It wouldn't be a day in my life without almost getting myself killed. And I'm here, just like I said I would be." 

The princess shook her head and covered the hand on her cheek with her own. 

"It's too late, Hiccup. I'm already married." 

Hiccup shook his head and pushed himself up to a seated position. 

"No, you're not." 

"Yes, I am. The priest said man and wife-" 

"But did you say I do?" 

Azure eyes narrowed and her brow furrowed. 

"Well...no..." 

"Then you're not married." 

Astrid fisted a hand in his shirt and pulled the pirate in for a rough kiss, lips bruising and face damp with relieved tears. He brought a hand to bury itself in her blonde locks and she pulled away to surface for air. Her hand came up to stroke his scruffy cheek as his fingers played with her braids. 

"You need a shave, mister pirate." she whispered. Hiccup pretended to look offended. 

"I've been a little preoccupied lately. Snotlout doesn't exactly offer a complementary barber with a stay in his torture chamber. Talk about service with a smile..." 

Astrid pulled him in for another kiss, lighter this time, savoring the taste of his lips on her own. 

"Don't ever scare me like that again, or you'll be the one getting his balls chopped off." Hiccup pressed a kiss to her forehead and inhaled the scent of soap in her hair. 

"Trust me, Milady. I have no intention of leaving you ever again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Astrid and Hiccup are reunited at last! And only two more chapters left until our story is complete! Will Eret be able to get his revenge in the next chapter? Will Hiccup and Astrid be able to escape the palace safely? You'll find out soon enough!


	10. My Name is Eret, Son of Eret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're in the final stretch! Only a couple chapters left and this story will be at its end. The last chapters will be shorter, and we get to see from Eret's perspective in this one.

Eret had locked in on his target the moment he entered the castle. He could practically taste revenge, could already smell the blood that was about to be spilled by his hands. He had been waiting years for this, training in fencing and combat tirelessly day after day, thinking of nothing but avenging his beloved father. He would often find himself whispering his father's name on his lips as he was drifting to sleep, picturing the scarred face of the man and memorizing every detail. Now, so close to what he had wanted, he felt more determined than ever. Fishlegs had directed him to where the man would be before helping Hiccup away, leaving Eret alone. He took cautious steps towards the door and could almost hear the labored breathing of Viggo. The man was hiding like a scared mouse. The whole palace was, terrified by the screaming of the guards and the rushed and frantic wedding ceremony. Eret braced himself and gripped the hilt of his sword with white knuckles. He had promised Hiccup a half hour. It was now or never. 

Eret threw himself against the door, breaking the old wooden thing off its hinges. He stepped into the luxurious room and saw the face of the man that murdered his father briefly flash a confused look before breaking into a snide smirk. Viggo unsheathed his own sword as Eret raised his. 

"And who do I have the pleasure of speaking to?" he asked calmly, voice dripping with venom. Eret pointed the sword towards the scarred man's chest and watched him back up ever so slightly. 

"Fifteen years ago," the swordsman began, relishing in Viggo's slowly crumbling calm demeanor. "You killed a blacksmith in cold blood over a sword. A good man, a father, who was just doing as you asked and wanted to be paid a fair price for his work. Do you remember?" 

Viggo tapped his chin in thought as he regained his composure. 

"Ah. I do remember. You must be his little brat. I thought you had learned your lesson after you challenged me the first time, boy. Do you really want to try your luck again? I promise I will not be as merciful this time." 

Eret squared his shoulders, steeling himself with resolve. He knew this would be a fight to to the death- and if he died, he would at least die in service to his father's memory. 

"My name is Eret, son of Eret." he said. "You killed my father. Prepare to die." 

With a flash of rage, Viggo lifted his sword and struck. Eret anticipated this and easily ducked and slashed, catching the man along his side. His opponent grimaced in pain as they danced back and forth, blocking and striking. 

"My name is Eret, son of Eret!" the swordsman screamed, blocking his opponent's sword. "You killed my father! Prepare to die!" 

Viggo growled and wildly slashed, each blow blocked expertly by the man in front of him. 

"Stop! Saying! That!" 

Eret rolled and slashed at Viggo's leg, drawing dark red blood from the flesh. The man howled and grabbed Eret by the shirt, hauling him to stand. They exchanged blows for what felt like hours, Eret repeating his earlier statement every so often. As the battle progressed, Eret caught the glint of reflecting metal out of the corner of his eye and leaned to the side as Viggo's dagger was thrust forward. It missed the vital organs due to Eret's quick movements, but the dagger still landed almost hilt-deep in the soft flesh of Eret's side. The swordsman screamed and backed away, clutching at the hilt of the weapon protruding from his body. Viggo gave a cold, callous laugh. 

"You will never defeat me, boy. You will die by my hand, just as your father did all those years ago. Weak and helpless and horribly outmatched." 

Eret grunted and took a heavy step forward, his side screaming in protest. 

"My name..." he grunted, taking another step. "Is...Eret. Son..." another step. "Of Eret. You killed...my father. Prepare...to die." 

Viggo had barely any time to react before Eret was pulling the dagger from his side. With a final cry of rage, he plunged the dagger into the scarred man's heart and watched as the light faded from his eyes and he fell, dead, to the floor. The wounded man gave a heavy sigh and dropped to his knees beside his enemy. He was bleeding badly from where the dagger had landed and would need to find Hiccup soon. But for now, all he could do was look at the man who killed his father, dead, in front of him. He allowed his eyes to close for a moment and let his hands rest on the cold floor. 

"Father. I have avenged you. Now please, help me find the masked man once more. I owe him a debt, and I intend to repay it."


	11. To The Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters to go! Hopefully will have this finished by tonight!

Hiccup and Astrid were formulating their escape plan, unaware of the footsteps that were swiftly approaching them. 

"Fishlegs is going to be coming around with the horses any minute now, if we tied your bed sheets together-" 

"No, that won't work, we might as well jump." 

"Milady, I don't know if that's possible for me at the moment-" 

The door creaked open and distracted the lovers from their plans. Snotlout entered with a satisfied smirk on his face, sword in hand. 

"Well, isn't this sweet." he purred. "The little farm boy came to rescue the princess." 

Astrid made to reach for her axe, but was stopped by Hiccup's hand coming to rest atop hers. She turned to glare at him and was met with pleading green eyes. 

"This is my fight, Milady." he whispered. Astrid shook her head and balled her fist. 

"But Hiccup-" 

"I understand that you want your revenge." he squeezed her hand. "But I promised to keep you safe. And if you kill him, we'll have a lot more to worry about than your marriage arrangement." 

"If you're not going to kill him, what are you going to do?" 

He placed a calloused hand on her cheek. His love's eyes were wide with worry, but he simply gave her a light kiss on the forehead before pulling back and gripping his sword. 

"Trust me." 

Snotlout came forward and scoffed as Hiccup tried to rise from the bed. 

"You really think you can take me? You can't even walk!" 

Chest heaving with labor and sweat on his brow, Hiccup gripped the bed post for support and heaved himself up. He made eye contact with Snotlout as he hopped forward and balanced on his right leg and lifted his sword. 

"I propose a deal." 

The young prince rolled his eyes. 

"I don't think you're in a position to be making deals. You were dying an hour ago!" 

"It takes a lot to kill me. And this is a deal I think you'll like?" 

Snotlout huffed and folded his arms over his chest. It took all of Astrid's strength not to beat him unconscious right there. 

"Fine. But if I don't like it, I'm killing you." 

Hiccup merely shrugged and leaned against the bed post. 

"Eh, get in line." 

"Hiccup..." Astrid warned. The swordsman ignored her and kept his eyes focused on Snotlout, who was growing more restless by the minute. 

"The deal: we fight." 

"Yeah, obviously." The prince sneered. Hiccup held up a hand to appease him. 

"I wasn't done. We fight, but not to the death. We fight to the pain." 

"The what?" Snotlout and Astrid cried in unison. Again, Hiccup was unfazed and kept his icy gaze on the man ahead. 

"To the pain. First, I chop off your hands. Then your feet, which hey, if you win, that means less work for you! Then, your eyes-" 

"Yeah, yeah, and then my ears, I get it." 

"No!" 

Astrid was startled by her lover's sudden shout. He never rose his voice unless he was angry beyond other reason. His forest green eyes had turned dark and cold and he had nothing but menace on his face. 

"Your ears, you keep, Snotface. Because then, everywhere you go, you will look like a monster, but you'll still have your hearing. Every time you walk into a village, you will hear children scream and mothers say "Oh Gods, what is that thing" with your two perfect ears. And you will live a long, unhappy life with no comfort or compassion and you may want to die. But I assure you, I will make sure you live as long as possible in your misery. I will make it my personal mission to ensure that you suffer just as I suffered, how Astrid has and would have suffered, at your hands. That is what to the pain means." 

Hiccup watched with a smirk as Snotlout's eyes rolled back into his head and he dropped to the floor. The swordsman sighed and sat back down, rubbing his stump and sheathing his sword. 

"Well, that was easier than I thought." he said. "Milady, would you do the honors?" 

"My pleasure, babe." 

Astrid moved from her seat and hauled Snotlout into a chair before binding his wrists and his ankles. The young prince continued to sleep, snoring lightly and drooling just a bit. Hiccup perked up as he heard a whistle down below, the signal from Fishlegs. He tried to stand by himself but swayed, the adrenaline no longer there to keep him upright. Astrid wrapped an arm around his waist and helped him over to the window. 

"I've got you, babe." 

Hiccup kissed her head in appreciation and peered out the window. As promised, Fishlegs had acquired four horses from the stables and was waiting below the window. The blonde man smiled and waved up at the couple. 

"Hey guys!" he called. "I got them, but we should go before someone notices. Where's Eret?" 

Just then, the door to Astrid's bedroom slammed open. The princess gripped her axe and made to strike, but Eret rushed over to her and held up his hands. They were red with blood. 

"It's me, don't throw!" 

The warrior lowered her axe and peered closer at the man. He was bleeding from his side, but he didn't seem to notice. 

"What happened to you?" she asked. Eret clenched his jaw and fondled the handle of his sword. 

"I've slain my father's killer." he replied. Hiccup contemplated his words for a moment before speaking. 

"That must not have been easy. I know you're a skilled swordsman, but now that you've gotten your revenge, you could put your talents to a better use. Ever considered piracy?" 

Astrid glanced up at her lover, forehead creased. 

"Hiccup?" 

Her love offered her a roguish wink. 

"I've been thinking about retiring for a while now, and Eret needs a new job since killed his old boss. I've got enough riches to retire and live in luxury for the rest of my life. And um...if, if it's okay...I'd really like to share it with you, Astrid." 

"You don't mean...?" 

He shrugged and ran a hand absently through her golden locks. 

"What do you think, Ast? You, me, a little cottage somewhere, just the two of us? If-if you want, I mean. I know you're this...this fierce, beautiful, courageous Valkyrie and you probably don't wanna marry a one-legged, fishbone pir-" 

His words were cut off by Astrid's lips, her grip tight on the front of his shirt as she hauled him in closer. He stumbled a bit on his one leg, finding purchase on her waist as he responded to the kiss. He could hear Eret and Fishlegs whistling and cat calling, but really, in this moment, he couldn't give a yak's ass. Astrid pulled away just enough to speak and smiled at Hiccup's expression, eyes still closed and lips still a bit pouted, expecting another kiss. 

"Yes, you idiot." 

The former pirate grinned and pulled her in for another kiss, arms wrapping around her back as hers came to rest on his shoulders. They were interrupted by a loud whistle from below. 

"Uh, guys?" Fishlegs called. "I'm all for a happy ending, but we've gotta go before we get caught." 

Hiccup reluctantly pulled away from the kiss and glanced out the window briefly before turning back to his love. 

"Shall, we Milady?" 

Astrid pressed a kiss to his cheek and helped him to rest against the support of the window ledge. He pressed a hand to her back as she clambered over, feet dangling over the edge, seeing FIshlegs with outstretched arms below and her horse Stormfly, patiently waiting. With a last glance over at her giddy lover, Astrid took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and jumped.


	12. Epilogue: The Captain's Wedding

Hiccup stood at the alter and fidgeted with the clasps on his cloak. It was a nice day- well, nice for a winter on Berk. The typically harsh wind had been reduced to a light breeze, and the tops of the houses were painted white with snow. Hiccup had protested to a winter wedding at first, but Astrid had insisted that she couldn't wait until summer, and frankly Hiccup didn't want to wait much longer either. Besides, there was really no arguing with Astrid. He was happy to indulge her every wish. If she had told him she wanted to marry him at the bottom of the ocean, he would have dived in head first. 

Gobber stood at his side, having come from his peaceful retirement in Itchy Armpit to serve as his former cabin boy's best man. He was joined by Fishlegs, the husky man grinning like mad in his new tunic. He had given up his old ways, never really enjoying his former position to begin with, and became a historian at the Berk Citadel. He was much happier now that he was surrounded with books, preferring to read about adventures than actually participate in them. Eret also stood at the alter, in the middle of the small platform and slightly behind Hiccup. He was doing quite well as the new Captain Night Fury. It had only been six months since he had taken over the position and he already had a loyal crew and enough riches to keep his pockets filled for a lifetime. As the captain of a ship, the new Night Fury was officiating the wedding, and was happy to do it. He had kept Hiccup's crew, and they had all been invited to see their former captain get married. Turns out, the crew had figured out a while ago that Hiccup wasn't the real Night Fury, and so Eret saw no point in finding himself a different set of men. They had respected Hiccup and trusted his new choice of captain and took to Eret quite well, and were frankly overjoyed to see that he was doing so well. Astrid had been hesitant about a band of pirates attending her wedding, but she had been assured that the crew would follow all the laws of Berk while in port and would be good guests. The audience also included Astrid's parents, who were now rich enough to buy a second farm and live comfortably, thanks to Hiccup, as well as Ruffnut and Tuffnut. Hiccup was a little worried about those two in attendance, seeing how Ruffnut was eyeing Eret like a piece of meat, but they had saved his life. 

Hiccup sighed and fiddled more with the clasps. Gobber had insisted that the groom wear the traditional captain's wedding attire with full honors (well, as much honor as a pirate captain can have). Astrid had agreed to the idea without much argument- she thought Hiccup rather handsome in his pirate clothes. So Hiccup had agreed, donning his black leather pants, black tunic, and long fur cloak. The clasps on the cloak were carved with the symbol of captain Night Fury- a dragon with bat-like wings, long ears, and a two-finned tail. A belt was wrapped around his waist with his family crest etched into the metal buckle, his ceremonial sword hanging from a loop at his hip. He had made it himself, having taken up in the forge after the events of Astrid's previous wedding. He had made the belt buckle himself too, and the cloak and clasps had been passed down from Gobber, who inherited it from Ack but never used it. 

The big man clapped a hand onto the nervous groom's shoulder, gold tooth shining through his crooked smile. 

"Aye, laddie. Don' be so nervous. It's jus' yer weddin day!" 

Hiccup offered a small smile. 

"I just...I can't believe this is finally happening. I've waited so long for this." 

Gobber gave a solemn nod and rubbed Hiccup's shoulder with his non prosthetic hand. He knew how much Hiccup and Astrid had both suffered, having recently reconnected with the lad after he had found the retired man's address and wrote to him. They became fast pen pals, and Gobber now knew everything that had transpired since handing the reigns over to his former cabin boy. Things had changed for Hiccup, and now, Berk was changing too. It turned out that Hiccup had found letters that evidenced Snotlout's crimes and made copies before sending them to the prince's father as well as the king of Berserk. Spitelout was outraged upon the discovery of his son's plot to kill his bride and start war with Berserk, as was the king of the neighboring island. The prince had been publicly shamed and disowned for his crimes, exiled to live out his days on Outcast Island. The king had gifted Astrid and Hiccup a very hefty sum for a wedding present, as well as lands and titles in repayment for his son's misdeeds. The king had also decided to take an opportunity to make peace with Berserk and named Heather Oswaldson, daughter of the king of Berserk, heir to both islands, firmly joining the two enemies as one nation. So now Snotlout was disowned, Berk had a new heir, and Astrid and Hiccup were made to be Lord Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III and Lady Astrid Hofferson- soon to be Lady Astrid Haddock. 

Hiccup adjusted himself once more and stood upright as the audience turned their gaze on Astrid, who had chosen to walk by herself rather than be escorted. Hiccup's eyes widened as she smiled at him. She was radiant, dressed in a simple cream gown with her family's crest embroidered on the loose cloth belt, a matching cloak around her shoulders. The clasps on the cloak were engraved with the symbol of Night Fury as well- brides of captains traditionally wore the insignia of their husband and Astrid had liked the idea. Originally, Hiccup had objected to the idea, seeing the tradition as outdated, but Astrid had argued, and like always, she had won. He couldn't remember exactly what her argument was, and right now, he was too lovesick to care. Her hair hung in loose waves around her shoulders and a traditional Berkian kransen was rested on the crown of her head, decorated with white blossoms. Hiccup ached to reach out to run his fingers through her hair, but felt it would be too intimate for such an occasion, especially with everyone's eyes on them. She took her place beside Hiccup and the two turned to each other as Eret spoke. 

"Friends. Family. Crewmates. We have gathered here today to join the Lord Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, formerly known as Captain Night Fury-" there were whistles and whoops from the crowd and Eret rolled his eyes. "To the Lady Astrid Hofferson. Will the best man present the rings?" 

Gobber hobbled forward and handed the two simple gold bands to Hiccup and winked. The groom blushed and offered his hand to Astrid, slipping the ring on her finger, and she in turn did the same for him. 

"Not too late to back out, Milady." Hiccup whispered with a glint in his eye. Astrid smirked. 

"You're not getting rid of me any time soon, Haddock." 

Eret cleared his throat behind them and they blushed at being caught in their banter. 

"Do you, Lord Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, take Lady Astrid, to be your wife?" 

Hiccup nodded, keeping his eyes on Astrid. 

"I do." 

"And do you, Lady Astrid Hofferson, take Lord Hiccup to be your husband?" 

She flashed Hiccup a dazzling smile. 

"I do." 

Eret removed a piece of red cloth from his pocket- a piece of one of the sails of Night Fury's ship. The pirate wound the piece of sail around the couple's intertwined hands. 

"As I bind your hands, you are now bound as one. You may kiss the bride." 

Astrid grabbed a handful of Hiccup's tunic and pulled him in for a kiss. He laughed against her lips and brought a hand to her cheek as he reciprocated. The wedding guests cheered, and several members of the crew wept and held each other. Blood roared in Hiccup's ears as he pulled away, grinning like a maniac. His wife smiled up at him and wrapped her arms around his neck. 

"Husband?" she murmured. Hiccup raised an eyebrow, but the smile stayed on his face. 

"Yes, wife?" 

Astrid rolled her eyes and tugged him closer, lips almost touching. The crew had started in on a chant now, all yelling "long live the captain" in unison at the top of their lungs. The couple didn't notice though. Hiccup could only focus on his wife as she buried her fingers in his auburn hair and whispered: 

"Kiss me again." 

Hiccup was all too happy to oblige. He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, savoring her loving smile as he pulled away after a long moment to rest his forehead against hers. He looked into her eyes and saw his past, his present, and most importantly, his future. He had everything he wanted right in front of him, and he vowed to spend the rest of his life making sure that he was never separated from her again. He offered his wife a grateful smile, taking in all her beauty and feeling love swell in his chest as he reminisced about a similar request she had made all those years ago, when he was just a farm boy and she was just the beautiful girl he fell in love with and had no hope to marry. Now, seeing his wife- his radient, fierce, Valkyrie of a wife- smiling up at him, he could only offer her those four words that promised all the love in the world. 

"As you wish, Milady."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> According to pirate lore, though some reports are conflicting, it is generally believed that a pirate captain could officiate weddings while at sea. Even though Hiccup and Astrid are on land, they wanted Eret to officiate, and now that Hiccup's a lord, he could afford to bend the rules a bit.


	13. Bonus Chapter

"That's it? It can't be over yet!" 

The voice pulled the old man from his thoughts and he snapped the book shut with a sigh. 

"All stories have to end at some time, bud. Even this one." 

He watched with a wrinkled smile as his grandson pouted. 

"I guess..." 

The old man rested the book on the bedside table and ruffled his grandson's hair. 

"C'mon, bud. It's past your bedtime, and I don't want your grandmother scolding us." 

As if on command, a knock came at the door and the old woman strode in. 

"Ah, speak of the devil." the old man grinned and turned to look at his wife from his chair. "Evening, Milady." 

The old woman rested her hand on her hip and leaned against the door frame. 

"And just what were you two trouble makers up to?" 

"Just a story, Grandma!" the young boy replied. He flashed her a gap toothed grin as she shook her head. 

"You both know the rules, and it's way past your bedtime. That goes for you too, Grandpa." 

The old man held up his hands in appeasement. 

"Okay, okay. Just let me find my leg..." 

"Grandpa, it's still attached!" his grandson giggled. The old man ruffled the boy's hair and knocked on his prosthetic leg. 

"Indeed it is. Well, you know what they say: I'd lose my head if it weren't screwed on straight. And in this case, my leg!" 

The old woman rolled her eyes, but there was a hint of amusement behind them and she offered an arm to the old man. 

"C'mon, old man. Let's get you into bed before you misplace another body part." 

"Hey, you're six months older than me." the old man huffed, taking his wife's arm. "If anything, you're the old one, not me." 

"You keep telling yourself that, babe." She turned out the light and pressed a kiss to her grandson's head before guiding her husband out of the room. His prosthetic was getting more difficult to walk on as he aged, but, being a stubborn man, he refused to use a cane in the house. So he leaned on his wife as she took him out into the hallway, stopping briefly to adjust his bow tie. He smiled down at her, the wrinkles around his eyes crinkling, and she brought up a hand to rest against his beard. 

"You need a shave." she commented. Her husband shrugged. 

"Ah, well. Been a bit preoccupied lately." 

The old woman finished smoothing out his tie and rose up to give him a quick kiss. 

"C'mon," she spoke tenderly. "Let's go to bed." 

The old man winked at his wife and leaned down to murmur against her lips. 

"As you wish, Milady." 

The old woman scoffed and swatted him lightly on the shoulder. 

"Oh, you!" she scolded. Her husband laughed and wrapped her up in his arms, pressing a sloppy kiss to her cheek. 

"You love it." 

The old woman tried to look annoyed, she really did, but she melted into her husband's arms and kissed the little scar on his chin. 

"Yeah, yeah, just wait until I get my hands on an axe." 

The old man laughed heartily. 

"I'll be ready when that day comes, Milady. For now, you're right, as you always are. Let's go to bed." 

(...) 

The young boy rolled his eyes as he heard the giggling of his grandparents slowly fade down the hall. They were so mushy all the time, sometimes the young boy found it nauseating. Sometimes their flirting kind of reminded him of Hiccup and Astrid from the book. His grandfather had bright green eyes and a crooked grin, and his grandmother's hair was always done in a braid and though her eyes were often narrowed and scolding (as he usually deserved), they were blue just like Astrid's. Sometimes his grandfather's friends would come to visit, and they reminded him of some people from the book, like Fishlegs and Eret. But they were just stories, people made up from the book his grandfather had read to him. His grandparents were just Grandpa and Grandma, not Hiccup and Astrid like in the book. Those weren't names for grandparents. The boy yawned and turned on his side, and as he fell asleep, he dreamed of thrilling sword fights, hidden identities, battles of wits, daring rescues, and of course. True love. The words swirled in his head as he slept, his grandfather's nasal voice crafting the world around him. 

The small island of Berk was cold and stubborn, the people even more so. It rained nine months of the year and snowed the other three. It was made up of small farms and even smaller villages, all surrounding the magnificent castle that belonged to the noble house of Jorgensen. On this small island, on a small farm, resided the Hofferson family...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't resist putting in the scene with the grandfather from the movie! And aren't Grandma and Grandpa just so sweet? And so similar to some other characters! Thank you all so much for sticking with me through this story, it was a labor of love and I enjoyed putting my own spin on it.   
> For clarity, here is the cast of characters from the Princess Bride with their coordinating HTTYD characters:  
> Wesley/Dreat Pirate Roberts-Hiccup/Night Fury  
> Buttercup-Astrid  
> Prince Humperdinck-Snotlout  
> Inigo Montoya-Eret  
> Miracle Max-Ruffnut and Tuffnut  
> Fezzik-Fishlegs  
> Vizzini-Dagur  
> Count Rugen-Viggo  
> Yellin-Ryker


End file.
